Have you ever felt like you're living and doing exactly what you're supposed to be living and doing?

I don't mean that your life is easy. I don't mean there is never any challenge or stress. I don't mean that everything is going your way.

I do mean that you feel perfectly content and at peace with where you're at, because you feel God placed you right there. Right now. "For such a time as this."

That's how I feel right now. It's an amazing feeling.

We really feel like every place we've lived (7 states, 9 zip codes/residences, 14 years), every church we've been a part of, every experience we've had.... has led us to right here where we are.

State 1: The start of us. The figuring out what we want, what our goals are, our foundation.

State 2: Our "church" here was at Jon's work. Jon worked with troubled and troubling youth in a residential setting. The facility had a church on campus - one of the most beautiful campuses and chapels I've ever experienced. It was here that we saw the authenticity of worship, the creativity of youth, and the pure joy and freedom experienced by those who have been extended grace. These kids are "the worst of the worst" according to society, many of whom commited terrible crimes. Yet they worshipped together, wrote the services, led the songs - every Sunday was so amazing. Grace abounds.

State 3: This is the first church where we I experienced a true "teaching" Pastor. He made the Bible come alive. I took copious notes each Sunday, bought sermon series on tape (yes, just dated myself -- cassette tape). I eagerly looked forward to each Sunday, to learning, to growing. He had an incredible gift for providing context to scripture, setting the history, and bringing it right back to the present. It was an incredible faith growing time for me.

State 4: We found our "family" at this church. Small group became an essential part of life. We'd participated in small groups before, but it really just felt like bible study versus a close personal relationship with them. Our small group this time around became our closest most trusted friends. It's now 7 years behind us, and they're still our closest friends and receive us as family with each visit. We knew that moving forward, small groups had to remain essential as we set up new homes.

State 5: We struggled in this state on many levels. It was a challenging and "dry" season in many ways. Despite that, it was also a time when I experienced immediate and obvious response to prayer over and over and over again. I was so grateful that God made Himself very obvious to me in a time that was full of doubt, loneliness, and challenges. As always, He proved Himself faithful. The lessons I learned about prayer during this time were invaluable.

State 6: This was our most trying state. Our most challenging time. It was full of stress, "wandering," loneliness. Yet we learned some very important things there, too. We will never again take for granted a strong church family. For 3 years, we church-hunted, but in the middle of the Bible belt, failed to find a church home. We were unable to find a small group. Our church life was lacking and it left a huge, sad hole in both of us. Despite that, what we experienced fully there was a new perspective on "the least of these." The non-profit world in that community was amazing. The community as a whole was very giving, charity-minded, and focused on serving. It broadened our perspective on how to serve, and convicted us even more strongly on the importance of not only our service, but also making that opportunity available to our kids.

State 7: Here we are now. Our sweet spot. As I've said before, we prayed about where we should go to church, and the church we were led to is pastored by a man who mentored under our pastor from State 3. Amazing. Historically we've visited churches where the pastor was good, but the worship or small groups were lacking. Or the small groups were consistent but the music was terrible and the pastor just mediocre. Or in some cases, the pastor wasn't right for us at all. We struggled to find a church where all the pieces fit together for us. Caveat to all of that -- we're a "consumer" society and too often we shop churches like we do groceries -- what can THEY do for ME instead asking how WE can serve THEM. But that's a completely different topic....

Anyway... so the pastor is awesome here. He's completely authentic. He speaks Truth. He teaches - provides the historical context of the Biblical passages and applies it to today. He's as imperfect as the rest of it and is amazed by the grace that we all receive. The messages always resonate. The music is seriously top-notch (very loud, too, but that's fine with us). The children's ministry is thriving. The small group network is alive and growing. And we're serving. Wow, the fire for serving here -- "the least of these" -- tutoring at an inner city school (we have 150+ tutors), extreme home makeovers and yard crashing takes place annually also in the inner city, building backpacks for an entire elementary school, filling stockings for an entire elementary school, festivals to outreach to the community. More important: a staff with a vision to spread the Gospel of Christ to the city. We've just scratched the surface, and the ideas just keep coming.

It's so incredible to be a part of the movement. The peace that comes from living in "the sweet spot" of where Christ would have us - a huge blessing.

My prayer is that my eyes, my heart, my ears remain open to the Word of the Lord so that I can move where He sends me. I kinda like it here... I'd like to stay. :)

Why are we always surprised when God shows up big?

We know He can.

We know He does.

For me, I think the surprise comes not from God showing up big, but because He has allowed me to witness it. The “big” moments I always attribute to someone else. I always seem to hear about them, but not experience them.

Lately, I’ve been so incredibly blessed to experience them.

We began attending our new church the weekend after we moved to our new city. It was an instant “fit” and we felt fortunate to find it. It was as if God was saying, “You’re going to have some challenges, but I’ll give you a church and you’ll feel My presence there. Know that I’m with you through it.”

Easter 2011 came shortly after we moved. The Easter service kicked off a “Be Audacious” series, speaking of having Audacious Faith – believing that God will do what He promises, trusting for Him to do amazing things. During that series, Pastor Paul spoke about our sphere of influence. At one service, he had us all write the names of people with whom we associate – family, friends, co-workers, students, baristas.  We each daily touch the lives of multiple people.

From that list, from that Sunday, our church of 500 came up with a list of 5400 people within our “Sphere of Influence.”

And that became our number: 5400.

It was announced that for Easter 2012, we would be renting out the biggest, most visible, most well-known park in the city. And we would be praying for the rest of the year for the 5400 people who would join us – after all, that is the quantity in our sphere of influence.

At the beginning of the Easter season, we were surprised to enter into a dark church – nothing on stage, no band – just a lone guitar and he was joined by an Easter Bunny…who happened to be our pastor! (Yikes!) The “Unexpected” series teaser was upon us.

That very day, 3 charter busses were waiting out back and the entire church loaded up the bus, watched a pre-recorded video sermon from the pastor, and we drove to the park where our Easter service would be held. That day we walked and prayed through the park, writing the names of those in our sphere of influence on pieces of bark scattered in the flower beds throughout the park.

Four weeks later was Easter. No one really knew what to expect. We had been praying for 5400, but would that become reality?

God showed up. Why were we surprised?

And of course, God being God, He had to show us that we could have believed for even more. Not only did 5400 people show up – over 5600 people showed up!

Unexpected.

That was the title of the series that kicked off on Easter Sunday. What an amazing thing to be a part of.

The "Unexpected" series concluded yesterday, Sunday, May 6, with the most powerful and amazing and mind-blowing service I’ve ever witnessed. I’m still absolutely in awe. I even broke out my least favorite word because it’s so overused. But it was very much appropriate to describe yesterday.

EPIC.

Yesterday morning was a top-secret, “unexpected” service. People came into church as they normally do, only the windows were black, so no one could sneak a peek.

Our church is pretty untraditional (but biblically spot on), and instead of a baptismal font, we have a huge swimming pool that we use for baptisms typically twice per year. Our baptisms are usually announced well in advance so people can prepare themselves, invite family and friends, bring a change of clothes, etc. We just had a baptism on Palm Sunday. No one was expecting to walk into church to see the baptismal pool.

Yet there it was.

Pastor Paul preached from Acts 8 about Phillip and the Ethiopian eunuch explaining the passage from Isaiah that he was reading. As their carriage rode through the desert, they came upon water, and in verse 36, the eunuch said to Phillip “Look, here is water. What can stand in the way of my being baptized?”

And with that, Pastor Paul jumped from the stage into the pool. Clothes and all.

He proceeded to remove all the barriers and excuses that people may have for why they shouldn’t get baptized that very moment:
- No change of dry clothes? Well no problem, we’ve got a shirt, shorts, and even undergarments for you to change into.
- Concerned about your hair? We’ve got combs, ponytail holders, detangler spray, and hairspray.
- Make up may run? Baby wipes are in each restroom and will clean you right up!
- No stink stop? Well we’ve even got spray on deodorant for you.

As Pastor Paul is explaining all of this during the first service, one man climbs the ladder and jumps in the pool – jeans, shirt, leather shoes and all. Even Pastor Paul was blown away! Another man followed that one – 2 people in their street clothes didn’t even wait for their change of clothes.

At the first service, 31 people “took the plunge,” publically declared their faith, and were baptized into Christ.

The church had planned for 40, so they had to make an emergency store run to restock supplies between services! What an incredible “problem” to have!

During the second service, 21 more people were “buried with him through baptism, and raised to live a new way of life through Jesus Christ.” -- 52 people in total.

Absolutely amazing, awesome, incredible, humbling, powerful, moving – amazing day!

Amazing God.

At church on Sunday, our pastor asked us to list the 5 things that impacted our lives in 2011. He then challenged us that they could propel us – either for the good or the bad – if we let them.

I reflected on the top 5 things that impacted my 2011. As I did, I realized that I had a pretty awesome year. The negative things that I did go through in 2011 (don’t we all?) were all but forgotten, and certainly worth the final outcome.

1) The Move. We tend to move a lot. I’d like for that trend to stop. This move has been AMAZING for us in so many ways – we love our church, our neighborhood, our friends, the kids schools, our jobs, the weather. There’s really nothing bad we can say about the move. Moves are never easy and almost always stressful – this is where much of the “negative” came in last year. However, the ultimate outcome was absolutely worth the price – even though we wish we didn’t have to pay it!


2) House Guests. Our brother-in-law took a 6 month job overseas. Because of where they lived, he’d basically only get to his family (Jon’s sister and their 3 kids) see them at Christmas. Their family consists of a 5 year old, 2 year old, and 7 month old. Having done the “work travel” gig, we know it’s no fun. Adding a new born to the mix makes it even more challenging. Because we live only a short plane ride from where he’s working, we offered for them to live with us during his 6 month stint. We have a “guest house” of sorts, but share laundry and kitchen facilities. They moved in the very same day we closed on our house. Needless to say, our life has been chaotic! It has also been a huge blessing – we’ve had a chance to get to know Jon’s sister better, get to know her family. The kids have always wanted to have family close. Not only that, but I’ve learned a lot about myself – two women in the kitchen can cause for a lot of introspection and growth! We’ve got about a month left of this living situation, and while there have certainly been challenges, we’re thankful we had the opportunity to host them.


3) New Church. In our last location, we spent 3 years church hunting. It was a miserable, empty, lonely feeling. We never found one where we felt we belonged. In the previous 3 moves, we found churches we really enjoyed, we loved Sunday mornings, loved the “family” we formed at our church, and really felt like we were growing in our walk with Christ and with each other. I won’t sugar coat it – the last 3 years have been some of the darkest in our walk with Christ and with each other. We feel now like that fog has lifted. After having gone without, we have a new appreciation for our church, love the people, love to serve, and can’t wait to continue that growth.


4) Small Groups / New Friends. Similar to missing church, we missed the Small Groups. We have been immensely blessed in our Small Groups in the past – they are very much as close as family to us. This is another thing that we have not had in the past 3 years and left a gaping hole in our lives. We have joined small groups and have met wonderful new friends through these groups. In fact, just this weekend, Jon texted a friend giving him the heads up that he was using his name as a reference. The return text invited us to dinner that very evening. Jon responded that dinner was already on the stove, but did they want to join us. It was a very impromptu, non-fancy dinner – and it meant the world to us. To fellowship over leftovers – not much is sweeter. I’m thankful to have friends like that again – that don’t require plans, but enjoy drop-ins.


5) Running. I’ve taken up running again. Something about living in a place that always hovers in the 70s-80s makes you want to eat and live healthier. For me, fitness and happiness are kind of a never-ending cycle – I need one to have the other. I discovered this past fall as I trained for a half marathon that when I run, everything works better – my attitude is better, which makes my relationships better, which makes my eating habits better, which makes me sleep better. I mentioned in a previous post that we are responsible for choosing happiness, choosing joy. In doing that, I think it’s important to understand the situations where it’s easiest to choose joy – and do what we can to plug in to those situations!


So what will I carry with me into 2012, and what will I cast off as lessons learned?


The move is behind me. I’ll cast off the negatives that were associated with it and dwell on everything that we love about our new home.


My sister-in-law’s 6 month stint is nearly complete. I’ll wish them Godspeed on their next endeavor, and apply the lessons I learned about myself in hopes of making me a more tolerable person. OK, maybe that’s a bit overstated – but unfortunately I did learn more about my negative qualities than my positive ones – things I definitely need to make strides to change in myself.


I absolutely plan to continue with our new church, and in doing so plan to become more involved in service.


Ditto small groups. When our travel schedule lets down, we’d also like to lead one. Maybe just host one for the short term? The friendships associated with them I’m holding onto like a lifeline (without suffocating the friends, that is). I’m better at acquaintances than friendships – and I need to keep working on that.


Running. My next big race is another half at the end of March. I figure if I keep paying the fee, I’ve got to keep running so as not to waste money! My head knows that it makes me happy… but my sleepy eyes don’t want to get out of bed! We’ll get there…


And I wonder what else? As he closed the sermon, he told us to stop asking God What If? And instead ask Why Not? With an Almighty God charting my course, Why Not? Anything is possible?

What great things will He lead me to and through in 2012 if I allow it? If I keep my mind and heart open to His call? I need to not doubt by asking “what if?” but instead look forward eagerly by asking, “Why not?!”

“I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” Phil 4:13

In Chapter 1 of “Blue Like Jazz,” Donald Miller discusses guilt and happiness. The specific section that stood out to me says, “I realized, late that night, that other people had feelings and fears and that my interactions with them actually meant something, that I could make them happy or sad in the way that I associated with them. Not only could I make them happy or sad, but I was responsible for the way I interacted with them. I suddenly felt responsible. I was supposed to make them happy. I was not supposed to make them sad.”


Aren’t both happiness and sadness a choice? I think they might be, at least to a certain degree.


I was brought up with the mantra “happiness is a choice.” I’m currently reminding my daughter almost daily to “choose glad, not sad.” She recently read the book “Pollyanna” and found that she could relate to the choice of glad over sad, even though sometimes she finds it more challenging to apply.


Let me first say, I don’t disagree with Miller’s ideas (as quoted above) as a whole. I think that we are absolutely responsible for our actions, words, and interactions with others. I think it’s certainly preferable to strive to make others happy versus sad. However, I do take slight exception with the word “responsible” – because I don’t believe we’re “responsible” for another’s happiness or sadness. We’re responsible for our own behaviors – and I definitely believe we should strive to reflect Christ in our choices. However, I don’t believe we’re responsible for how others choose to react to our behavior.


If I’m responsible for my own happiness, logically that would also require that others are responsible for their own happiness.


In subsequent chapters, Miller speaks about being narcissistic. I submit that guilt is a very narcissistic feeling. Not from a legal, “You’re guilty” type of away, but from the perspective of feeling responsible for another’s happiness. Frankly, that “guilt” assumes that you have entirely more power than you do.


Certainly, if you’ve blatantly acted against another, feeling guilty for that poor behavior is probably a good thing. (I should also add that in that case, it’s probably best to admit your wrong doing and ask forgiveness from the person you’ve offended.) However, to feel solely responsible for a person’s happiness is slightly arrogant. In doing so, there’s an absolute potential for elevating one’s importance to a level that’s not real. Conversely, it also discounts the amount of grace one assumes the other person is willing to extend.


During December, our pastor did a series about unwrapping various feelings associated with Christmas. One of these was Joy / Happiness. Our pastor talked about the dictionary definition of happiness, which includes this description: “results from the possession or attainment of what one considers good.” While there’s more to the definition, this snippet suggests that happiness or joy is situational. That would be great if life were perfect.

Guess what. It’s not.


I think we need to use the tools God has given us to create situations for ourselves that make it easier to choose joy; likewise, interact with others that make it easier for them to choose joy. However, we’re not always going to be in a perfect situation. We’re not always going to be in the possession of things considered to be good. In fact, we’re going to be dealt our fair share of disappointments and heartache.


Such is life.


However, therein lies our challenge. Our challenge is to choose joy anyway.


I understand the common feedback – how do you choose joy when life is crumbling around you? I submit that true joy goes much deeper than the surface. We can easily paste a smile on our face and pretend that things are peachy. However, I believe that true joy goes much deeper. I believe that true joy requires us to adopt God’s perspective, believe “that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God to those who are called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28). It requires us to believe that when our life is out of control, God is in control.

Trusting that promise requires faith.


In faith, we can find pure joy. Not circumstantial joy. Not fleeting joy. Not a flash of happiness. But a lasting, peaceful joy that permeates our life.


I’m not sure this at all reflected Chapter 1 of “Blue Like Jazz” – but it’s the rabbit hole my thoughts went down with the excerpt that stuck out to me.

As the New Year rolled around, Jon and I began talking about things we wanted to do more intentionally. One of them is read / Bible Study. To that end, we just purchased a book by Donald Miller called "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: How I Learned to Live a Better Story." He wrote the book, "Blue Like Jazz," which Jon really enjoyed and which I intend to read. As we read the book and discuss it together, I hope that we can uncover ways that we can "live a better story" as a individuals, a couple, and as a family.

For Christmas, I received a book from my sister-in-law. One afternoon the kids were out front swinging, so I brought my book out to read it on the front steps. Amara came up to me and said, "Mom, I didn't know that you liked to read books." She adores reading; a passion I want to encourage. Similar to my purpose in running -- to set a good example for the kids -- I need to follow that mantra with books as well. I do love to read -- I just haven't taken the time to do it in over a decade.

Boy... write it like that and it seems like an eternity!

In my journey to live a better story, there are a few things I hope to do...

1) Journal it. I've never been much of a journaler or a writer -- however, I do believe that there's power in the written word. If you write it, you do it. I hope/plan to write and/or blog as I do each of the items below.

2) Bible Study and Christian Reading - I want to read more books, but I want them to be books with a purpose. I want them to be encouraging, inspirational, and challenging of my status quo. I want to become a better person because of the books that I read. That said, I need to also focus on personal Bible Study, not using books, no matter how Christian, to take the place of the Bible.

3) Date Nights - I want to be more intentional about Date Nights both with Jon as well as with each child. I have some willing participants at church who would be willing to do a "child swap." I need to pursue that more intentionally so that we each can benefit from date nights at least once a month. For each child, we've begun a list of things we'd like to do together - some free, some cheap, some a bit more of a splurge. I did a couple "date days" with my daughter over Christmas, which were really more like errands, but they meant the world to her. I need to be intentional about spending one-on-one time with each of them.

4) Eating and Exercise - During October and November last year, I was very intentional about eating and exercising as I prepared to run a Half Marathon. I felt great about my finish, my performance, and the impact it had on how my clothes fit. :) However, like in the past, once I was done, I stopped being intentional. I've signed up for another race in March, and I've got to recapture the efforts both in my eating and my exercising. This is not only a great example for the kids, but I know it pleases Jon, and I feel so much better about myself and life in general when I'm taking good care of myself! Not to mention, my vitals are improved -- when I took our company's health assessment, my bad cholesterol was so low it didn't register (I have had high cholesterol in the past), and the assessor said he'd never seen such strong numbers! (Of course... he may have just been telling me that to make me feel good!)

5) Relationships - At our New Year's Day church service, we were challenged to pray over one area of our life where we could stand some work, and ask God to help us improve. I wrote down the broad category of relationships. Starting with God; my relationship with Jesus Christ is sometimes pretty one-sided.... and I'm not talking about me putting forth the effort. I know He's always there, but I'm often lax and don't show up. This also will include my relationship with Jon. We did a small group called "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage" last semester and really were surprised by some of the thing we learned about each other, and also were shown ways to be more intentional about the "little things" so that we could live life more smoothly. My relationship with my kids is probably the most "solid" on a day to day basis because they're still young - while I anticipate those relationships to become rocky through the teen years, I also know that the best way to minimize that is to invest the time now -- hence the date nights. And finally, relationships with friends -- I've always had a lot of acquaintences, but not a lot of friends. I'm good at keeping people at a distance, because I've convinced myself that if they knew the "true me" they wouldn't like me. Get behind me satan - that's not a lie worth believing. It's a lie that leads to loneliness. In our new home, new church, I've met some wonderful people who I believe will become great friends. I need to be intentional in those relationships to nurture the friendships.

So how does this all look on the blog?

Honestly... I have no idea.

I'm really not feeling the pull to blog right now, and in my mind, I kind of prefer the crude paper / pen approach. I'm not sure though, because typing is so much easier and faster. So it may be a bit of both.

At this point, I'm leaning on "If you write it, you do it" -- so here it is.

That... and my friend Reese told me to blog again. :)

We'll see where it goes from here!

Wow.

What an insane past 5-6 months. In February I received a promotion. In March the kids and I moved. In April, May, and June, Jon commuted. In July, we finally closed on both houses - one to sell, the other to buy.

I will say with complete honesty, it has been some of the most excruciating 5 months of our lives. Neither of us have faced a string of challenges such as we faced during the relocation. Truth be told, everything is not yet resolved, but it's getting there. I won't detail everything that went wrong... but suffice it to say that literally everything went wrong.

Yet.... without question, without hesitation... God absolutely showed up.

And that gave me peace.

And that's what I *will* share.

I hear so many people tell me that God had a hand in their move -- He answered prayers to sell their house, find a house, find a job -- just smoothed the way for everything. I don't doubt that -- not one bit.

But.... what about when the way isn't smooth? What about when every little thing goes wrong. What if there's a battle waiting to be fought at every corner? Does that mean God's NOT in the move? Does it mean we're not acting in accordance with His will? I will say it's easy to let your mind wander down that path. And it's probably a good thing to ask Him -- to be sure that you really are on the path He intends.

My short answer: Just because you're in God's will doesn't mean He promises a smooth path.

Look at Job. I'm quite sure that book of the Bible was written to remind me during the past few months that God's there even in challenging times.

But here's the beautiful thing: despite the ridiculous challenges, God showed up in ways that were unquestionably Him, and undeniably assuring us we're going the right way; doing the right thing.

With every single move we've made -- and that includes 7 states now -- it has taken us a minimum of 6 months to find a church. Our last place we never did find one. Here... the first week.

When we lived in NY, we had a pastor who I just loved. I didn't even know the guy; it was a huge church. But for the first time, I couldn't wait to go to church on Sundays. He was a teaching pastor, and He made the word absolutely come alive, gave it context, helped me see it in ways and more deeply than I ever had. As we scoured websites looking for churches in our new city (I literally googled "church city" with our city inserted), I randomly came upon a site for a church who interviewed its staff and asked them various questions. One of the questions was "Who is your mentor."

I about fell off my chair when the lead pastor listed as his mentor... our pastor from NY. No way... half a country away.

We woke up that next morning and visited the church, shared with the pastor how we found it.... and we've been back every Sunday since. That was in March.

Not 2 weeks later... they changed their website. That survey and the reference to our pastor in NY is gone. If that's not God saying, "Hey guys, I know you need a place to plug in. I know you want desperately to find a good church, and that's what I want for you, too -- come over here."

In late May or early June, we finally found a house that we felt we could call home in a neighborhood we felt would be a wonderful place to raise our kids. A couple weeks later, Jon's sister called sharing that her husband has an overseas opportunity -- and can they come for Thanksgiving so that during the 6 months he's gone, they can all get together once to see each other.

The house we chose has a guest suite and living room over the garage. The house was never on the market -- our realtor just knew about it. We suggested that his sister and her 3 kids just live there for 6 months -- it's closer and hopefully they can see their daddy at least once a month.

God is a God of relationships. I very much believe that He worked out those details so that we can nurture our relationship with our extended family, and so that their precious family can maintain their relationship during a long 6 months.

Life isn't promised to be easy or without hurdles. The saying "God doesn't give you more than you can handle" I believe to be a bunch of bunk. During the past 6 months, I have been given more than I can handle more than I'd like to admit. But it's when I'm weak that His strength is shown -- not just to me but to those who see me. At least I hope it is. His grace covers me, covers my family.

God showed up bit in the "Faith" and "Family" category, which gave me peace through the turmoil. I'll admit to losing it a few times at the end. I did hit my breaking point. But God didn't. God is always faithful. We made it through to the end.

As I said, there are still a few loose ends that are frustratingly not yet tied up. There are several hundred boxes yet to be unpacked.

But...

Church friends from our new church have volunteered to help out with the kids.
We've got 5 happy and healthy kiddos giggling together, excited to have cousins to play with, love, and get to know in a way most cousins never do.
More people have stopped to say "welcome to the neighborhood" than the number of neighbors we had in our last place.
And last night when the kids wanted to swing out in the front yard... it took only a few minutes before 10 kids were out there playing.

Thank you, God.

That's right... moved again.

Our last stop had us parked for 3 years, which is the longest we've lived anywhere in our nearly 13 year marriage. However, we've been called to state number 7 -- we've moved from Arkansas to Florida!

Or at least we're in the process of it.

The kids and I are here -- we're settled in a little apartment near my office. They're in school (and excelling and loving it!). Jon's still in Arkansas finishing things up at our house so we can get it on the market. There's a lot of loose ends that still need to be tied up. In the meantime, we're doing a lot of back and forth.

Last week I trained my backfill, so I'm officially wiping my hands clean of my last position and I'm on to my new one! YAY!

While I completely believe that God puts us in each place for a purpose and I believe we've followed His leading to each of those places, there are already things going on here that just make me say, "Thank you God!"

Specifically...
Church hunting is always a real challenge for us. In some cases, it has been more challenging than others. We were nervous and even a bit hesitant to begin. It seemed our options may be a bit challenging here. And then I accidentally stumbled upon a church website. I had surfed many different church searches and it hadn't come up -- but there it was. On the "Staff" link, it listed the staff (duh!). Each staff was asked a series of questions, one of which was "Who is your inspiration."

Each staff listed people who have inspired them. However... among those listed by the lead pastor.... was the pastor of the church we attended 10 years ago in Buffalo! This man was (is) an incredible teaching pastor, and he's the pastor who first made the history of scripture come alive. I couldn't wait to go to church each Sunday, I took copious notes, I learned, I grew.

We were SO pumped!

We visited there this Sunday. Turns out the pastor there was a youth pastor under his "inspiration" pastor... We will be returning, and hopefully have found our Florida church home in our first visit! If not, that's fine, too. But we sat in thankful awe at how the Lord speaks to us.

Thanks be to God!

When I look at a patch of dandelions, I see a bunch of weeds that are going to take over my yard.
My kids see flowers for Mom and blowing white fluff you can wish on.

When I look at an old drunk and he smiles at me, I see a smelly, dirty person who probably wants money and I look away.
My kids see someone smiling at them and they smile back.

When I hear music I love, I know I can't carry a tune and don't have much rhythm so I sit self-consciously and listen.
My kids feel the beat and move to it. They sing out the words. If they don't know them, they make up their own.

When I feel wind on my face, I brace myself against it. I feel it messing up my hair and pulling me back when I walk.
My kids close their eyes, spread their arms and fly with it, until they fall to the ground laughing.

When I pray, I say thee and thou and grant me this, give me that.
My kids say, "Hi God! Thanks for my toys and my friends. Please keep the bad dreams away tonight. Sorry, I don't want to go to Heaven yet. I would miss my Mommy and Daddy."

When I see a mud puddle I step around it. I see muddy shoes and dirty carpets.
My kids sit in it. They see dams to build, rivers to cross and worms to play with.

I wonder if we are given kids to teach or to learn from? No wonder God loves the little children!! Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

I wish you mud puddles and dandelions!
Author Unknown

Thank you Lord for the perspective you give me through my children. Help me to see the world more often through their eyes. And help me to keep their eyes open to the possibility and wonder that they are currently experiencing. Help me to nurture their childhood and maintain their perspective. Amen.

We've lived in Hog country for almost 3 years, and this is only the 2nd game we've attended. The kids were excited - they were taught to call the hogs in preschool when we first moved - they learned it probably their first week (and taught it to their cousins - hilarious!).

So we got them all dressed in their hogs gear (ignore the Arizona A on Amara's cheek - she says it's for Amara) - and we headed to the game. It's a good crowd tonight for their homecoming - a sea of red.

I am praying that the guy behind me loses his voice. He's yelling so loudly that my hair is moving with his shouts. It's so obnoxious and loud. At least he's not using foul language, but still - my ears are ringing!

It's a beautiful night for a game. Go hogs!

Oh... and I do have to add comments on attire. I will never understand why guys wear suits and girls get all dressed up for games. The guys in the stands with their chests painted to spell out RAZORHOGS make complete sense to me. But the fancy pants.... I'm sorry, but I just don't think I'll ever get used to it. I will also add that I fell into neither category -- I was in jeans and a long-sleeved Razorback shirt. No heels. No pearls. Just in case you were wondering. :)

Perhaps I'm a total geek, but I loved school. And even now, as I walk into Amara's school to visit, I'm filled with giddiness.

That's how I felt today as I joined their Halloween party. They were supposed to dress as their favorite storybook character. Each child got to stand up and share about their choice. Then they decorated masks and cupcakes, and then they played a mummy game.

It was a fun day, but can I just say...God bless teachers! I'm SO thankful for Amara's teacher and all those called to be teachers. I am NOT one of those, and by the time we were dismissed, I was more than ready for some peace and quiet!

We are going to a Halloween party tonight, which means a sitter is coming. Friday nights at our house are typically the messiest state of our house for the week - it has suffered a week of neglect and anticipates Saturday chores. When a babysitter is scheduled, that means a frantic cleaning Friday after we get home -- all hands on deck.

I'm not sure how I got so lucky, but my kids love it. I'm not sure there's anything I loathe more!!!

Tonight, we cleaned, we baked (needed a dish for the party), we dyed my hair and painted my face. Then I deemed the house good enough. I heard the kids in their bedroom area and assumed they were playing. I headed to my room to change clothes -- the picture is what I saw. Despite my good enough, they were still going -- washing the window. Dominic is singing, "cleaning is the best," and Amara is negotiating strategy, "you get the top, I'll get the bottom." They're calling out for more soap, asking each other for clean washcloths.

It's completely irrelevant that they're cleaning the mirror with soap and water, which means it will undoubtedly be streakier than before. What makes me so proud is they not only CHOSE to do it, they also did it as such a great collaboration with each other!

This is the sky that greeted us from A's school this morning...

Isn't God the most incredible artist?

M.I.A.

Yep, that’s me.

I unintentionally spent a little time away, which led to a longer time away, which has made it REALLY hard to return. It’s not like anything crazy has happened – life has happened. That’s all. And life is great! But life is busy, and my blog (and all my other hobbies) get sorely neglected when life gets busy.

At the end of the day, I blog for myself – to preserve my memories and the things our family does. So I’m really only hurting myself. I use this cool “slurp” function on blurb.com at the end of each year to pull all my blog entries into a book. Then I add photos or scrapbook pages from the year to complete the book. And that’s all fine and good – except when I go M.I.A. And now I’ve got a 2 month “gap” in my memories. And we all know my memory alone isn’t enough to fill in that gap!

So… my last entry was July 30. What has happened since then? Let me catch you up quickly….

In July we had Jon’s whole family come to visit – which was a blast! We had 17 people and 2 dogs under our roof. It was such a blast that I spent a bunch of time pulling together the photos, but no time putting it on the blog. Probably should’ve done that! We also had our neighbors and wonderful friends from Baltimore come visit us for a long weekend. What a breath of “home” their visit was to us! Again… should’ve put pictures up and shared about the time…. But didn’t. And we went to Kansas City for the weekend – met my parents halfway and let the kids have a fun time with them. Again – no pictures on the blog. Not a good track record going here! And then we had Amara starting Kindergarten, Amara starting piano lessons, Amara turning 6, both kids starting soccer again, a family trip to Denver, and Dominic starting a new preschool. And there you have it – 2 months in one paragraph. Now you’re caught up on our life!

During the past 2 months, I have been adding goofy things the kids have said to Facebook. They really need to have a “slurp” feature on FB, too, so I can pull from there for my annual book…. Hmm….

So I’ll troll through my old FB status updates simply to be able to add these to the book. If you’re my “friend” on FB, these will be old. But still funny. So feel free to read or skip. They’re most recent first.

9/26: Amara’s talking to Grandma W on the phone. Grandma W lives in Wyoming. We live in Arkansas. She says, “Grandma, it’s FREEZING in Arkansas.” Somehow I suspect they’d consider it balmy here.

9/26: I do believe the kids got their fashion sense from me. And that’s NOT a good thing. We sent them to get dressed so we could head to Sam’s. They both had full dressers, as laundry was just completed. So they essentially had their entire wardrobe from which to choose an outfit. Dominic entered our room wearing a red Lightning McQueen t-shirt with turquoise, green, and yellow plaid shorts, navy blue socks with basketballs on them, and I think black shoes (not sure if his shoes were on yet). As I was laughing at him and telling him to go put on jean shorts, Jon said, “Just wait, another one is coming.” Amara walked around the corner in a bright purple butterfly t-shirt paired with a teal, yellow, and green skirt (inside out no-less – which doesn’t work when the skirt has built-in shorts), black and pink socks with ear-muffed monkeys on them, and black slip on dress shoes. She said she matched her colors in groups. I confess I was laughing so hard at their choices that she actually started crying – and I felt terrible about that. But I did let her keep on everything but the skirt – and just helped her select a skirt that matched. I think Jon needs to give lessons in fashion to them.

The kids were talking about ankles and bones. I wasn’t quite sure exactly what they were talking about within that context, but my ears perked up when Dominic said, “Mom, sometimes my bones bite my ankles and I scream like a girl.” I laughed at the “scream like a girl” part – which for whatever reason really amused him, but I think also embarrassed him, so he had to backtrack on himself and remove the “scream like a girl” from his statement.

9/23: You know it has been a long week when the kids wake up with the following comments. Amara: I wish it was Saturday. Dominic. I wish it was a day where everyone had to go to school except us.

9/20: Dominic: I saw a car without a bottle cap! Me: You mean a hub cap? Dominic: Yeah.

9/10: (Dominic’s last day at LSP) Dominic just informed me that Miss Clara and Miss Trista are his girlfriends. (They’re his teachers.)

9/5: Conversation in the backseat. Dominic: Amara, what do you want to do? Amara: Let’s dance! Dominic: I don’t want to dance. I want to fight coyotes!

9/5: Dominic: Sometimes I eat jellyfish for breakfast.

9/4: Dominic at 7:30am: Mommy, it’s morning. Me: I know, but we’re still sleeping. So is Amara. Dominic through a tear cracking voice: Why do you always do that? You always sleep too long. I don’t like people who sleep long.

9/3: For Amara’s birthday, we went to the Japanese Hibachi grill. They turned down all the lights and turned on strobe lights. Amara said, “I think they’re going to come sing Happy Birthday to me in Spanish.”

8/31: Dominic: Mommy, when I can ride my bike without training wheels…. I can have a motorcycle.

8/25: Dominic: I know why King Kong is mean. He’s really, really hungry. (Must be a Wxxxxxxx!)

8/22: Amara has a baby doll who is lacking in the clothing department (she’s got 2 outfits). So I took one of Dominic’s old sweaters and made it into a dress. Amara ended up with legwarmers out of the deal – the sleeves worked nicely for such a purpose. The funny thing: She wouldn’t take them off!

8/14: One of the sweetest things… Both kids are supposed to be napping. They’re both in their own beds. But they’re not napping. They’re singing. And they’re not just singing, they’re essentially singing a duet with each other – each with their own words and melodies, but definitely together. This is the good stuff.

8/7: Upon picking Dominic up from his Sunday School class tonight, Jon was told by his new teacher, “He’s a blast!” Why thank you. Yes… he is.

8/5: Amara mastered the art of tying her shoes!

8/3: I find it ironic (or poetic justice) that Dominic obeys the shoes in the closet rule at bedtime – by gathering up ALL his shoes from the house instead of getting jammies on and teeth brushed like he was told to do.

A year ago, I blogged about 1,287, a Homelessness Awareness Event unique to our area. It was an amazing event to be a part of, because in the span of 1 month, a friend of Jon's called him with the idea, implemented, and executed the idea. One month after the idea was shared, they were able to sit down and discuss the event that took place as a result. Here's Cobblestone Project's recap of the day.

Now THAT is a man of action. I was blown away.

A year later, Mr. Mark Horvath is returning to revisit 1,287. You know WHY he's returning? Because of all the communities he visited last year, our community was among the top of those who accomplished the most following his visit.

I'd say that our community must have several like minded people of action.

It's a cool thing to witness. It's a cool thing to be a part of.



So on Saturday night, our family will once again be counted at 1,287 revisited. Last year, a homeless census was taken, and it was estimated that we had 1,287 homeless people in our area. Of those, a large portion are women, children, and veterans. Of those, a large portion are people who would be able to find a manufacturing job in another city - but we have very few blue collar opportunities in our region. Of those, many are good, solid, hard working people, who have just come across hard times and have no support network.

The face of homelessness is changing. The face of poverty is changing. It's awesome to be a part of the movement trying to solve the problem.

I'll come back after the event on Saturday night and share with you some of the things Mark talked about. Where possible, I'll link you up to the things that have been implemented since last year. I know for sure: Our Step and The Farm. But I'm certain there are more: Laundry Love, Shear Kindness, the DC... I can't wait to return to share more!

Last night Jon and I were invited to a dinner party whose purpose was to consider the global orphan crisis. There were people from all over our area in attendance, some of whom I knew, others of whom I didn't know. The common thread was that all of the people in attendance have been called to serve and have a love for God and what He calls us to do.

And what does God call us to do? In fact, quite a lot, and here are a few examples:

Psalm 82:3 "Defend the poor and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy."

Psalm 10:17-18 "You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry, defending the fatherless and the oppressed, in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more."

Matthew 25:31-36 "When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. "Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'"

Isaiah 1:17 "Learn to do right! Seek justice, encourage the oppressed. Defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow."

We are surrounded by several friends and acquaintances who have been called to adopt from countries such as Haiti and Ethiopia -- countries where the orphan crisis is staggering. At this point, we are not feeling called to adopt, but we are absolutely feeling called to do something. And that's why we were at the dinner last night.

Chris Marlow was the guest speaker for the night. He is from Austin, TX, and is the Director of Help End Local Poverty. This organization has a division specifically focused on Haiti, with their initiative "We Have Not Forgotten."

I wish I'd have taken notes as Chris shared his testimony. Some of the things he said rocked me. I won't remember the countries he visited, but I'll do my best to recount some of his stories.

As he visited one devastated country, a young boy, about 10 years old, approached him and apologized for the state of his country. He then proceeded to say he didn't want to beg for food, but hasn't eaten in 3 days and could he please work for it? Imagine the devastation Chris must have felt as he had to tell the boy no because he didn't have any, and the grocery stores literally did not have any food on their shelves?

Can you imagine that? No food on a grocery store shelf? Because of how this country was set up (I think it was Zimbabwe), they had to get groceries from a neighboring country, and if that neighboring country didn't deliver, they were out of luck. And the inflation and cost was a ridiculous number I can't even begin to fathom. But to turn away a child in such away -- wrecked. I can't imagine.

In another country, he visited with a family whose father had been killed in a natural disaster. He was a pastor, and the church crumbled as he was preaching. His family watched him get buried by the rubble. The family was surviving on $1 a day. That alone is mind-blowing to me. A visiting pastor with a seminary degree (i.e. not a business degree) wrote up a business plan. He hooked up local women with someone to teach them how to make and sell purses. That family is now living on $8 per day. When asked how she feels about the change, her response was that she feels rich.

Wow! Rich on $8 a day. Here, we complain if we only make $8 an hour. I will grant you that things in the US cost money, and it would be nearly impossible to survive in the US on $8 a day. But the stark contrast is again mind-blowing. I may not be able to survive here on $8 per day, but certainly I can survive on less than I currently am.

Following the earthquake in Haiti, he visited the country. He visited with a young girl who lost both of her parents in the devastation. The person who was leading him through the country commented that the little girl had no hope. He asked why. The response was that she'd be raped at least 3 or 4 times before she's age 18. Tears immediately sprung to my eyes at that statement. They also commented that Haiti really is no different now than it was immediately following the earthquake. There's still so much devastation and work left to do. We are being begged to not forget Haiti. If we've been, we've been asked to return. If we haven't been, we've been asked to go. Or help others go, as not all of us are able to go.

A couple weeks ago we went to a going away party for a local couple who is serving for 6 months in Haiti. I introduced you to them about a month ago. When we were at their going away party, Jon sent both kids with some money to them, and told them to say, "Thank you for serving in Haiti for us -- while we're unable to go, thank you for going." I know they were prompted, but the message is the same.

On Saturday, we were shopping and there was a food bank outside of the grocery store collecting cans. As an FYI, food banks, homeless shelters, non profits in general, get crazy-low in the summer because people "forget" to help. It's easy for them to raise money, obtain donations, etc, during Thanksgiving and Christmas, but it's pretty lean during the summer months. Anyway, the food bank was collecting. So as we bought our groceries, I purchased an extra bag of canned goods for the kids to donate. When we went outside, I had Dominic give the bag to the workers. They applauded. I was SO tickled that they showed their appreciation in that way -- that they made a big deal out of his donation to illustrate the importance of doing so. What struck me, however, was that Amara asked why they clapped. She has grown pretty accustomed to giving, that she doesn't see it as out of the ordinary. She sees it as just something that you do, rather than something that deserves applause.

Back to last night, and the purpose for the title of this blog post.

In another country Chris visited, they brought a bunch of food to a pastor at a church. Upon delivery, they asked how long it would last, and were told a couple weeks. They were visibly disappointed that it wouldn't last longer. I wish I could remember the exact words, but essentially the pastor said, "You American's. Always pursuing the American Dream and needing to know the answers so far out. Where's the faith the God will provide for today? God not only provided for today, but for a couple weeks!"

That was very sobering to me.

We're so focused on future planning, keeping up with the Jones's, wearing nice clothes and shoes, providing the best for our kids, investing for the future. And I'm not suggesting we DON'T do those things. But at the same time, sometimes in doing those things, we're taking all the control upon ourselves and trusting God for nothing.

The American Dream, in many ways, is self-serving and self-reliant. God calls us to serve others and be reliant upon Him. There's a huge disconnect for me with the American Dream and God's calling. I know I've not been reliant enough upon God. I know I've been selfish and controlling, determining to accomplish things on my own.

I may be living the American Dream... but is it's God's dream for me?

I'm not sure yet what direction we'll move. I know that in his job, Jon's challenged with these ideas daily. I'm thankful for that. I'm also thankful that his job provides me opportunities to immerse myself in those ideas. In the corporate world it's very easy to get sucked into all things material -- and I don't want that.

So we'll see what's next. I don't know when, I don't know how, I don't know what it looks like. But I want to be open to what God has in store.

This photo was taken 4 years ago. Dominic was about a week old.



I thought for sure he'd be late like Amara (she was 10 days over her due date), and arrive on the Fourth of July. I thought about how cool that would be to celebrate his birthday with fireworks every year. But he was right on time, so I got to get them all dressed up in their matching red, white, and blue to celebrate the freedoms we have in this wonderful country.

But as the say on the photo goes, "The best things in life aren't free -- but priceless."

The same can be said for our freedom. It is truly priceless.

God Bless You and God Bless America!

It all started several months ago. Amara would wake frequently with bad dreams. We have a Veggie Tales book that says, "God is bigger than the boogie man," so I tried to use that as a reference.

I told her that God is bigger than the monsters in her dreams.

I told her that the monsters are afraid of God, and they're afraid of her, too.

I told her to tell those monsters to scram and leave her alone.

Oh... and I told her there's no such thing as monsters anyway. Why is it that line of logic never works?

Over the next few nights, weeks, and months, those comments turned to prayers. The prayers were for God to clear her head of all the bad and help her think of only good things, only pure things, only happy things.

And she slept.

On the night before his birthday, Dominic came sobbing into our room at about 3am. I asked him what was the matter. He cried, "Mommy, I need you to pray for me." I asked what for? He said, "For Jesus to take all the scary thoughts from my head."

My heart melted right there. I hugged my little guy close, stroked is soft fuzzy head, and prayed for the Lord of his heart to clear his mind to sleep soundly and peacefully.

With each prayer I offer with the kids, I follow it with one of my own, "Lord, please answer this prayer so that they can see You, so that they can feel You, so they can know You."

On the morning of his birthday, the two kids met in the hallway. Amara told Dominic she dreamed of his birthday and all the fun they'd have. Dominic responded, "Oh yeah, well Jesus gave me lots of great things to dream about."

Again my heart swelled. I whispered a prayer of thanks to Jesus for answering their prayer, for showing Himself to my children.

That relationship they have now. That tangibility that they feel. The conversations that they have with Jesus at the drop of a hat as if He's right next to them -- because He is.

Isaiah 11:6 "A little child shall lead them..."
Matthew 18:3 "Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven." (Mark 10:15) (Luke 18:17)
Matthew 18:4 "Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."
Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, "Let the children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." (Mark 10:14) (Luke 18:16)

Is there any doubt how much Christ cares for His children? Before our children were born, we committed them back to the Lord. They are His children; we've been entrusted them. But they are His.

My prayer is that the relationship that they have with Jesus right now continues to grow. It is so strong right now, so real, so tangible, so innocent and pure. The part of me that knows the world knows that their faith will likely be shaken several times over throughout the course of their life. But the bigger part of my cries out to my Savior asking for their little hearts and minds to continue to be molded and shaped by Him and for Him. I pray that He gives me wisdom to lead them and to point to Him.

Acts 13:33 "that God has fulfilled this promise to our children in that He raised up Jesus, as it is also written in the second Psalm, 'YOU ARE MY SON; TODAY I HAVE BEGOTTEN YOU.'"

1 John 4:4 "You are from God, little children, and have overcome them; because greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world."

I feel as if I've talked in circles and not properly expressed how important these prayers, these overheard conversations, and God's responses have been to me. It's quite amazing and humbling to watch your child's faith literally bloom and develop before your eyes. I could feel myself choking up as I tried to explain it to my Mom, and even as I type, I feel the tightening of my throat.

At this point in my life, this is my most important purpose: to show them Christ. My prayer is that they know Him, love Him, and serve Him with all their heart, soul, and mind.

I'll close with the camp song I've recently been reintroduced to. When I was a camp counselor we closed every campfire with this song. I believe it was written by our director at the time, Layne Nelson. The words and melody were poignant then, but have since taken on a new and deeper meaning as I insert my children's names and pray it over them each night.

"May the Spirit of God descend upon this place. Keep us safe inside Your arms; fill us with Your grace. Put love deep within our hearts and peace within our souls. Guide us wherever we may go, for You are in control. Sing alleluia! Alleluia! And guide us wherever we may go so we may humbly serve You."